It’s officially 5 February. I have been super consistent with my food and exercise. I forget whether or not I posted about Zach doing keto on my last post. He has been doing keto for one week as of Saturday. He’s coming up on two weeks as we speak! He is lost just about 20 pounds in that timeframe! I am so proud of him! He went from eating fast food and drinking tons of soda to completely keto under 20 g of carbs per day! I guess that could kind of be scary for someone and it seems as though Zach is really missing his carbs! He’s been doing really good sticking to his plan and not eating outside of the keto window.

I’ve been going to the gym super consistently and exercising daily as well. I’m trying keto right now and I’m currently at 258.8!! ⬇️91.2 lbs!

I just figured I would write some type of blog just to recognize where I am now. Being 90 pounds down is a big fucking deal!!!

😬😬😬😬

Last day of the month today! Excited for this next month. I’ve found myself being hard on myself toward the end of this month. Keep telling myself I should be farther along than I actually am today. Started this month close to 280 lbs! I wanted to get down to 260 by the end of the month. I know people say it’s stupid to place weight goals, but it’s a way for me to measure progress. I’m well aware that people do and don’t like those things. The good thing about having a weight loss journey is that this is mine. It’s catered to me, I made this plan.

Sorry if the photo seems perverted; but that’s not the intention. Look at the definition in my chest. My collar bones; and the muscles. I’ve been doing mainly cardio this month. I’ve lifted SOME. I’m trying to grow my flat booty. I’ve been doing squats and hip thrusts. Honestly; not sure if you guys have done them before: but it’s a bit embarrassing to do them at the gym. I shouldn’t be embarrassed but when people are around and it looks like you’re humping the air, just seems a bit awkward. Zach has been doing awesome! He started his journey last Sunday! He decided on keto, and he’s been working out, and stopped SODA!! HOOOOORAY!! I’m excited for him, and I’ve been cheering him non stop!

We took his weight and he’s dropping daily, with no end in sight! I’ll share here because it’s a safe and mostly private space. He started at 330, and he’s at 318! 12 lbs in less than a week!! WOOOP! I need to get a “before” picture of him with his shirt off so we have something to compare it to! He said he’s already feeling like he needs to tighten the belt on his work pants!!! He asked me if he looked smaller! 😊

Yay, to us! We rock!

I’m around 261 hovering! Let’s get to 250 by March 1st!

Happy Friday! 😘

Sharing a NSV. I have stairs at work to get into my office. It’s a steep staircase probably 25 ish stairs practically straight TF up! Anyway, when we first moved over to this office in June 2019, the stairs literally killed meeeee every trip. Since I’ve been working more on cardio and sprints, they have gotten significantly easier, I don’t have anything to measure off of, but I can tell you positively it’s made a difference. I push hard AF during my cardio. This means for me that my Resting HR is generally lower than most people my age. I’ve actually been notified practically daily that my HR has stayed below 50 for over 10 minutes straight. This is actually very exciting! I was going to provide data using my HR, but it’s hard to search for things while on the stairs!

Today calls for a MF blog post. We’ve reached mid January. I wanted to share something exciting with you all!

I have officially reached the 260s! I have been pushing to get out of the 270s since May 2019. Finally reached that awesome goal this morning! FUCKING badass. I’ll tell you this, it’s been everything BUT easy. I’ve temporarily quit, I’ve backslid, I’ve eaten things I shouldn’t, I’ve skipped workouts, I’ve been lazy… BUT NOW I am more motivated than I have been in a long time. I tried on my wedding dress for the first time since I got married in 2017. It’s been 2.5 years, I’ve lost 80 lbs. EIGHTY FUCKING POUNDS forever. 😭❤️

Excuse me while I may cry all day because how proud I am of myself for not giving up!

I cried all the way to the gym listening to “Rise Up” by Andra Day. Check that fuggin shiiiit.

Happy Thursday. Love you guys. ❤️❤️❤️

Hiii friends! The year started in the middle of the week, which I don’t particularly care for, but today is day 7! At least I think, the time all runs together. All I know, is that it’s Tuesday. Last night hubby and I went and ate at Texas Roadhouse, I was so proud of myself. I did indulge in an appetizer and some peanuts and even one roll.. but it wasn’t anything like it’s been in the past. I remember super over indulging before. I remember seeing how many pieces of the appetizer I could eat before Zach! Not last night. They brought out 4 rolls with the delicious cinnamon butter; your girl only had ONE!! Seriously a fucking win! Also when it comes to the app, 8 slices of potato skins, I only ate 2 with sour cream! And I tried to limit the sour cream even! Who am I? A girl who wants to reach mother fucking goooooals this year. It’s hard. Very hard saying no to things.

My struggle isn’t so much eating out, because I don’t really eat out anymore, the problem for me is the weekends. It’s hard for me to get my water in for some reason, and then I start getting bored, so I go in the kitchen looking for something to eat to pass the time. Caught myself multiple times doing it over this past weekend. I do have some shit food at my house that Waylon snacks on. I keep reminding myself those are Waylon’s snacks, not mine. So I don’t eat them. (Today is technically the 10th bc I forgot to publish this, but it’s fine.)

I’m determined to make this whole year fking great, and I hope you are too!

It’s only been a few days since my last post.., or was it yesterday? 😂 the time all runs together when it’s still a holiday week! Back to work for me today after having 1 day off for New Year’s Day! Hooray! My work is awesome with holiday pay. Short week, so let’s get it! Putting in that work today at the gym, and working hard at work!! My official new PR is 13:06! One second better than yesterday. I’ll take it! Go me! Weight was up from yesterday but I did eat a large bowl of chili and I’m Assuming it was high in sodium! 🤷🏻‍♀️ back on the grind today! Let’s get it!!

I feel it’s appropriate to get a blog out there for the new year. Currently at PF on the stair climber it’s fine. Ran a mile and got a new PR: 13:07. Wheeew!! My practice lately with running has just been endurance, not speed. I am pleased with my time changing a bit, and being able to run a “slow” mile. I am very motivated by time. At home if I only have a little bit of time I will set an alarm for cleaning and power clean until the time runs out. I feel like I’m it as efficient but I still get shit done so it’s fine ultimately,

Please see my goal list above. Some of the goals will be hard to hit, but isn’t that the ultimate goal? I’m excited for the year and feeling So Good!

Hope you guys have set at least a few goals that may seem just a smudge out of reach. It’s fun to hit something you didn’t think was possible. Also set attainable goals. It’s no fun to always be chasing something with no reward. Reward yourself for small goals. But your self a new shirt after losing 15 lbs. treat yourself to a pedi or something after -30. Stay motivated! Technically motivation is Just a word, not so much of a feeling.

We got this!! Message me if you’re struggling and get into my FREE IG accountability group!!

💕 you guys!

I know there are so many coaches and people out there that tell you not to focus on the scale. I get that concept. The scale isn’t everything. Inches can be lost instead of pounds and that’s still progress. A positive mindset is better than any amount of weight lost. The mental drive to continue on the plan you chose even when you don’t want to. When motivation is gone. When you feel like you can’t go another minute, go ONE more. I can’t remember, but I think my last post was about my November goals! So far I’m killing the no candy. Yep, haven’t indulged in a one! 🙌🏼 water wise, I’m killing it. A gallon or more everyday so far. Running I’ve put on the back burner a little but because of a sciatic/hip flare up. I’ve been coming to the gym since Tuesday I think, and today’s Saturday. Haven’t missed anything this week. I’ve stayed in a calorie deficit everyday, which for me is SO FUCKING EXCITING. Celebrate with me!!

Here is a progress photo for you.

This is old, the left photo. It’s just a week after my wedding in 2017 when I weighed in as my highest known weight, I’m sure I actually weighed MORE than 350 lbs before I stepped on a scale. I avoided it. I avoided mirrors. Avoided full body photos. I was always winded. I couldn’t fit down the “big kid slide” at the park with my kid, literally my hips got stuck and I had to SHIMMY the fuck out of my body to get down this thing. No way I would’ve thought about running anywhere except after my kid, and I could barely keep up. Forget being outside in the summer. Your girl LIVED for the AC! I wanted to wear cute clothes hut being in a size 4/5 shirt from Torrid couldn’t do that. I was a 26 jeans. I could fit into torrid clothes but couldn’t afford them. I would wear a means 3x shirt and leggings at home all the time. I felt so bad about myself I tried to use reverse psychology on myself. Punishing myself more or less, I told myself I couldn’t wear makeup or get my hair colored until I lost __ pounds. Isn’t that sick? I was so fucked in the head. And that STILL didn’t motivate me enough to really bite in and do it.

Even now I struggle with my mind. It works differently than most people who aren’t in “weight loss mode”. Meaning when someone offers me something be it a cookie, or snack, I automatically say yes without thinking! The old me would’ve eaten what they offered and then tried to sneak eat more of it when they were gone.

This week I’ve had a few MAJOR NSVs, first being buying a woman’s Xl leggings/workout pants from Ross. I didn’t have to buy 2x,,, or 4x…. Another was the fact that I went to a 4 hour long meeting at work and they ended up catering in lunch. I didn’t want to eat off plan, but didn’t want to be rude either. I stayed in the room until the meeting was over and then when the food was delivered, I went back to my desk. I politely excused myself. I have eaten a few “treat” things, but not in excess!

My last BINGE was October 4! Which was the same day I had my last fast food, and over ate as well. I think I spent over $25 that day between breakfast and lunch out. 😖😳

The basic point of this is just to keep going and it WILL click. The scale going down is my motivation, but if it doesn’t that day, I KEEP PUSHING.

STRONGBODY STRONGMIND ❤️

Excuse any typos I’m writing from the elliptical.😂

If you’ve gotten this far, love you.

Hey Monday, we meet again! Mondays aren’t as bad now as I remember them being. I literally used to dread going to work, because I hated my job, and the fact that I had to get up out of bed. I guess you could say at some point in my life I’ve been depressed. At the time I didn’t realize that I was depressed. I do feel like I go through periods when the season changes and it gets dark earlier and the sun is an out as much. But I don’t want this blog post to be about depression or the weather.

Halloween came and went. It was a snowy 28° here so we did not go trick-or-treating outside. One of the goals I made for myself was no Halloween candy. Actually no candy in general! I made a few goals for the month of November that I’m super excited about! one of the goals I have is no candy of course!  another one of my goals is to run for seven minutes straight! The other day at the gym I literally ran for five minutes straight with no breaks! I completely surprise myself and literally did nothing that I can do it! Your mind tries to play tricks on you when your body can keep going. A new mantra that I have now is strong body strong mind. Your body can do so many more things than you think you’re capable of doing. The month of November so far has not been a total wash. Although it is only the fourth, I haven’t done terrible. I do have big goals this month both physically and weight loss related.

My other two goals are maintain with no fast food. Today has officially been a month fast food free! And the final goal was to make it to the gym five days a week. I have been down for a little while with severe back pain. I feel like my back pain stems from sciatic issues that I think are actually caused by a bulging disc in my back. One of my friends on Instagram named Richard has severe back issues as well but he’s currently in an inpatient physical therapy program. Back pain could be caused by so many different things but you don’t wanna wait to get it checked out.

Today has been OK food wise. For breakfast I had two Mandarin oranges and a Cliff bar. Lunch was two sandwich thins eight slices of lunchmeat mustard and lettuce and about eight small cheddar rice cakes. I did end up eating some carrots in between for a snack because I was hungry! So far at the time this post is published all have drank 210 ounces of water. Honestly I’m kind of trying to just flush the toxins out of my body. I did eat a lot of carbs over the weekend and maybe even eat a little bit more than I planned, but I didn’t eat any fast food and I didn’t eat any candy, so I’m calling that a win!

I’m in several accountability groups on IG and FB, so this month really should Rock! 🙌🏼👊🏼

Anyway, bye for now.

This has been a crazy week at work. I’m not a big fan of plans changing, and or drastic changes. I get into my groove, and I get used to certain things. The shaking up that happened, I wasn’t expecting at all. My mom cancelled on me watching Waylon on Monday night and we change it to Tuesday, and the same thing happened last week. I know plans change, I just like plans. I think it has something to do with my self-diagnosed anxiety.

I do have a little bit of anxiety, but I try to keep it at bay by ignoring it. I mainly have the anxiety when I think someone wants to change plans. Also, the times when I expect certain things, but what I expect doesn’t come to fruition. For example, if my husband tells me he’ll be home at a certain time, and I’m expecting that, and then wake up in the middle of the night and he’s still not home, my mind immediately races. I know sometimes, it’s in my head. An ex-boyfriend cheated on me, and sometimes my mind tries to wander there. Zach I don’t think would ever do that, but my mind still tries to go there. I’ve had some therapy in the past, and I’ve been medicated once with a medication for anxiety and one for depression. They didn’t help when I took them, just made me act like a zombie. I cried a lot during work, and had to fight to stay awake.  My mind also goes to… Has he been in a car accident? Did he just forget to message me?

I’m somewhat confident in my skin/with my abilities. Sometimes things can happen that make you second guess things, but in all reality, I’m very smart. I don’t claim to be the smartest person out there. Although this blog is somewhat a journal for me, I also want to start using it to help other people. I have a story that needs to be heard that could potentially help others that have gone through the same or similar things as me.

I think it would be really awesome to have a profession in life to help people. I really want to be a nurse, it’s something I’ve wanted ever since I was in high school. I went to school and took all gen eds but 2, and I just need to be accepted into the nursing program and have nursing classes and clinicals. I registered for a semester of classes when Waylon was 4 months old. I was working full time and going to school fulltime. I had 2 night classes per week and my mom committed to keeping Waylon. It was hard… SO HARD. I had 2 online classes as well. I struggled to stay up late enough for homework, and to work ahead when I had the time. Most nights, I’d put Waylon to bed, and then I would get back up and go do homework til 3 AM, and then go workout, and go to work. It was a very stressful time for me. I ended up having to quit classes again because Zach and I got married, and I couldn’t qualify for financial aid anymore. Once that happened, I literally could not afford classes. I was undecided if I wanted the debt, and I couldn’t schedule the clinicals and nursing classes to fit into my day job. I couldn’t afford to quit working because we have so many bills, but I also started finding my way at my day job. I’m an assistant  data marketing analyst at an insurance company. I work on projects a lot, analyze data, and make recommendations on marketing based on past results. If I went back to school at this point, my job pays for it if it’s something to do with my career advancement. I could potentially get a degree in business management or something else that would help me excel, and be more of an asset.

This week so far has been okay. On Monday morning I was at 281.1. Today, which is Wednesday, I’m at 280.3. I feel as though I’ve been pretty okay this week so far. Today I’ve done AMAZING so far. I’ve had breakfast, lunch, and then I had a snack which was oatmeal. My calories and numbers are looking great. I will try to eat a light dinner if I have one. Last night I roasted some potatoes and carrots in the oven. I found out the issue that I had with my bladder/kidneys. I’m not sure exactly actually if it was to do with the caffeine I’ve been consuming, or if it was the fake sugar(Sweet N Low). But one of those 2 things was the culprit.

The gym has been decent this week as well. Night workout Monday, Morning Tuesday, Night Wednesday. I’ve been mainly focusing on cardio this week. Maybe next week I’ll start back in with my lifting/cardio combo. It’s just hard to get to the gym so early in the morning. IF I prep all of my clothes and food the night before, it makes it so much easier. I’m just always so tired and just don’t feel like doing all of that right before bedtime.

 

I’m trying to make a better effort on keeping up with my house chores as well. I hate it when things fall behind. One of the things I need to focus more on, is vacuuming up dog hair!! It gets really bad really fast and can be repulsive.

Waylon is so big, and it just kills me to see how smart he is. Speaking of kids, my friend Crystal actually had a terrible thing happen to her while she was trying to take her child inside of  a store. They parked in a handicapped spot because her son has significant medical issues to warrant a handicap placard. She said she got out of the car and was helping to get him out of the car and someone actually had the audacity to say something to her. They were yelling and cursing at her saying he didn’t look disabled. Things like this make me so sad. If a doctor or whoever actually warrants the handicap placard deems you as handicapped, what is the deal with people being so rude? Regardless if he thought it was his space to say something, I’d have smacked him had I been there. SO rude, and disrespectful. Plus who says you have to LOOK a certain way to be disabled? Zach’s cousin has a brain injury and he “looks normal”. No one would know by looking at him that he has anything wrong with him, but if they had a sticker or something and I was with them when someone started speaking with them that way, you’d bet your ass I’d be the first person who’d be throwing a fit right back! BULLSHIT.

 

ANYWAY, my friend Chelsea got engaged!! WOOP. 

 

Also, if you’ve made it this far, you da real MVP.